Family Ties: Meet the Smith Family
By Michele Murphy
What makes up a family? Is it based on biological blood relations? Is it the people you would call in case of an emergency? Folks who know everything about you — including your history, habits, and sense of humor — and still love you anyway? Families come in all shapes, sizes, and configurations, and many times they spring forth from the most unexpected places, bringing people together in ways they may have never considered.
The San Lorenzo Valley is a wonderful place to raise a family, and many great families are intricately woven into the colorful fabric of our community, making our little mountain towns incredibly special places. This story is about a local extended family that adds some very unique threads to that fabric — one that has overcome extremely challenging obstacles by being open-hearted, creative, brave, and, some might say, a bit unorthodox.
We’ll start at the beginning. Naomi Murphy met Kevin Smith when they were in their early 20s in 2011. The young, impetuous couple cruised down to Santa Cruz City Hall in 2012 and eloped in full flannel attire (mountain style), taking up residence in Boulder Creek. In April of that same year, they welcomed their beautiful daughter, Riley Jo, into the valley and the wider world, and bought a home on a steep, sunny slope in the hills of Lompico. Young love doesn’t always survive the perils of marital bliss and child-rearing, and three years later they separated amicably, continuing to co-parent Riley Jo while Naomi worked on her nursing degree.
Kevin met his current wife, Kelsey, in late 2017, and they married in 2019. Right from the get-go, Naomi and Kelsey hit it off. Naomi says, “I felt like I immediately clicked with her. I don’t even refer to her as stepmom — I lovingly refer to her as Mom 2.0.” She jokes, “I was so thankful that Kevin somehow tricked her into marrying him!”
Right around this time, in January 2018, Naomi met Brian Smith (no relation to Kevin) while working as a nurse in the ER at Watsonville Hospital on a night shift. Brian arrived by ambulance, working as a paramedic, and marveled at how at ease and in control she was, seemingly unfazed by her intense work environment. He struck up a conversation, then found her on Facebook later that night and invited her out for hot chocolate after their respective shifts ended.
Two weeks after they met, Naomi was diagnosed with two different types of aggressive cervical cancer. She said, “It was far enough along that they recommended removing my cervix, uterus, fallopian tubes, and all of my pelvic lymph nodes — basically everything reproductive except for the ovaries. And Brian had known for years that he wanted a child.” Naomi says, “I was surprised that he stuck around through all the cancer stuff, even though we had just met and I wouldn’t be able to have kids, at least not the traditional way.” Her oncologist shared that he had children via surrogacy — the first time she had heard of it — and told her that if she ever wanted more children, she could pursue egg retrieval and have a biological child through surrogacy, since she still had her ovaries.
Naomi and Brian married in September 2021, asking attendees not for gifts, but for funds to help them realize their dream of having a child together. They started the surrogacy process that same year — finding a fertility clinic, working with a surrogacy agency, completing the medical clearance process, matching with a surrogate, and creating embryos. They had several failed attempts with one surrogate who lived in Missouri, and after the second failed embryo transfer, she shared that she was dealing with some difficult life events and needed to put her surrogacy journey on hold. It was disappointing for the couple, but, Naomi says, “completely understandable.”
Kevin and Kelsey’s daughter, Izzy, was also born that September. Naomi remembers holding Izzy for the first time when she came home from the hospital and thinking, “I know I’m not blood-related to her, but she still feels like my family because she is Riley’s little sister.”
One day, Riley was at her horseback riding lesson at the Zayante Ranch, and Kevin came to watch. Naomi said, “He asked how everything was going with the surrogacy journey since we had lost our previous surrogate.” Naomi filled him in on how they were starting the process all over again and how difficult it had been. “He started joking around that we should just have Kelsey do it, because she loved being pregnant. I told him to shut up and leave poor Kelsey alone.”
Later that evening, Kevin went home and filled Kelsey in on where things stood with the surrogacy journey. She told him that carrying a baby for Naomi and Brian was something she had already considered. The next day, Naomi remembers, “Kelsey reached out to me and said something to the effect of, ‘I would totally carry a baby for you guys — I loved being pregnant, I just don’t want any more kids of my own.'” Naomi asked if she was joking. She wasn’t.
“So,” Naomi said, “from there we started the process.” Tragically, the first embryo transfer to Kelsey resulted in an ectopic pregnancy, which ruptured and led to emergency surgery and the removal of her fallopian tubes. Naomi says, “I felt horrible. Kelsey had lost her own ability to conceive naturally because she was trying to give us this gift.” She continues, “Imagine my surprise when one of the first things Kelsey said after being released from the hospital was that we needed to get in touch with the fertility clinic to find out when we could do another embryo transfer.” A couple of months later they tried again, without success. Then, in September 2024, another embryo transfer resulted in a viable pregnancy, and baby Ash Eóin (pronounced like Owen) Smith was born on May 14th, 2025.
Naomi reflects, “The best thing to come out of this life adventure, for me, is this amazing blended family I get to have, and an even deeper bond with Kelsey. From a co-parenting standpoint for Riley Jo, I hope the cohesiveness between both parts of her family makes her feel all the more loved and confident, and that she never feels like she has to choose between either side. And Brian got to feel supported by these three selfless people and welcome his little boy into a unique and exceptional family.”
Kelsey says, “Blended families don’t come with an instruction booklet, so this honestly just felt really normal for us — even though it’s a story you’ll probably only hear once in your life. We’ve always had a solid co-parenting relationship, and everything we do comes back to the kids. We want them to grow up together and always feel surrounded by love. From the very beginning of this story, there was never any drama — just a lot of trust. This was the coolest thing I’ve ever done. Giving someone the gift of life — words can’t begin to explain the overwhelming sense of joy that came over me the moment Ash was born. I hope this shows people that families touched by divorce can still be healthy and full of love.”
A sense of humor is also a key ingredient to everyone surviving and thriving throughout this long, drawn-out, scary, and exciting journey, and it runs deep within this mountain family. When asked what he got out of this unusual experience, Kevin said, “The best thing to come out of this arrangement is our kids getting a big, loving family. And Kelsey giving them the gift of life — knowing that my ex-wife will forever be in debt to her — is what helps me sleep at night. There’s no greater feeling than holding the upper hand once again.”
Live, laugh, love. That’s what it’s all about, no matter what your family looks like.
(Photo contributed)
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